Self-Love is NOT selfish!

Happy Love Day!

The world celebrates Valentine’s Day. A romantic Day!

I must say, love must be celebrated daily not just one day per year.

However, I want to talk about self-love in particular because self-love is never selfish.

Self-love is the foundation of happiness and well-being. It is the base of any love, any relationship and any success.

Self-love is accepting and valuing oneself unconditionally. It is recognising one’s self-worth and imperfections.

When one achieves self-love, one is then able to maintain healthy and positive relationships with oneself and others. To love and respect others, one has to start with their own self first.

Practicing self-love will contribute to overall well-being and mental health. Another benefit of self-love is that it boosts one’s confidence massively by recognising one’s self-worth and appreciating one as a whole.

Reaching self-love turns one into a role model for many people around them; in particular parents who show their kids how they practice self-love, this gets passed on to them.

In today’s fast-paced world there is a lot of influence and pressure from the environments surrounding us that impose standards of beauty, success and worthiness. These expectations can lead to feelings of inadequacy, self-doubt, stress and anxiety as we compare ourselves with others. We end up having our identity and authenticity robbed.

Overcoming these barriers of self-doubt and perfectionism requires self-awareness of one’s thoughts, emotions and bodily sensations.

I hear you asking, OK but how can one practice self-love?

Well, self-love can be achieved by the following:

1. Challenge negative self-talk: notice your inner voices, shift your mindset to use positive self-talk to empower yourself.
2. Practicing self-care: indulging yourself, that could be by the simplest things such as going for a walk, preparing your favourite meal, having a long bath. Nourish your mind, body and soul.
3. Setting personal and professional boundaries as well as communicating them: saying NO to what does not align with you and your values, saying NO to commitments and relationships that do not serve you!
4. Journaling about positive qualities, strengths and achievements; reflecting back on your successes, your skills and even your weaknesses and how you can improve these.
5. Use daily Affirmation: Start your day with positive affirmations that reinforce self-love and self-worth.
6. Practice Gratitude: take few moments a day mornings or evenings; or both, and reflect on something, someone or a moment that you are grateful for.
7. Setting goals: allowing yourself to dream and have a vision of where you want to be, honouring those dreams and working towards them.
8. Surrounding yourself with positive interactions: positivity is contagious. Be surrounded by people who matter to you and you matter to them; those who lift you up, encourage and motivate you.
9. Practice self-compassion and forgiveness: be gentle on yourself, allow yourself to make mistakes and see failure as a learning opportunity. Focus on self-growth.
10. Celebrate your progress and achievements is a form of self-love.

Let’s not seek validation from others constantly and neglect our own needs and identity.

Let’s use this time to develop and honour the most important relationship which is with ourselves and celebrate love differently.

Celebrate loving YOU everyday!